Last spring I had the opportunity to go to Joshua Tree and it was phenomenal. I highly recommend it. The desert is a welcome change of scenery, especially when coming from the puget sound.
I find my mind wandering back to that trip often. There was something incredibly serene about being in the middle of nowhere. I crave that feeling of having nothing to do except walk around and look at the rocks and trees.
Last year I graduated college and in the time since I have felt my freedom slip away. Before I would have a Summer as an open canvas to scheme up trips, parties, and other shenanigans. Sure, I had to work some shifts slinging polos and khakis at Nordstrom but it was easy to get time off.
Now that I have a “nine to five” which is actually more like a nice to 5:30 (because apparently the lunch break is unpaid) I feel restricted. The flexibility of being a student has been replaced with the burden of being an adult. It’s hard to even make time to dream.
I think back to Joshua Tree, when I was optimistic. I could lie in the sun and daydream of how my life would turn out. What I would do post graduation. Now I think about if I will have enough energy to go run errands after work. If I will be able to afford a gym membership and developing photos.
The world used to seem so open. I used to be bored. I used to draw, and write, and read. But lately I’ve just been exhausted.